How to set boundaries
Whether you’re an entrepreneur, a parent, a corporate employee, a caregiver, or any mix of them all… I know you want to leave a legacy. You want to be remembered when you’re gone. Don’t we all?
We build our lives and careers around our skills and the goals we want to accomplish. But we know that those goals can feel “boastful,” or like they’re only for ourselves. So then the question becomes: How can we turn what we do every single day into something that makes a difference for the rest of our lives?
Recently, I spoke with Dr. Tiffany Eurich, a philomath (lover of learning) and PR specialist who helps small business owners and professionals market themselves well while remaining grounded and authentic. And she has more than a few great ways to help you serve others, succeed in your life and career, and thrive.
Know yourself really well
Strengths are going to serve as the baseline for what you’re good at and how you will excel. And despite the positive connotation of the word, most people feel like acknowledging their strengths is somewhat taboo.
Tiffany thinks the opposite! In fact, when she was in college, she took the StrengthsFinder test and used that to continue building out her armory of strengths that she could leverage and play off of.
We also need to know our weaknesses. In order to show someone else why they should hire us, buy our product, become our friend, or simply spend time around us, we need to know ourselves and be able to articulate those things.
You need to be able to advocate for yourself, because no one else will. Self-advocation begins with knowing yourself on a deep, cellular level. The better you know your strengths, the better you will know your weaknesses, which will allow you to improve and evolve them.
Along with this, Tiffany points out that it’s important to pull focus back from yourself and look at how you can serve other people — especially if you want to leave a legacy. Knowing yourself extremely well will support your journey in serving others. Don’t expect to be simply celebrated for fulfilling your obligations, but look for ways you can exceed those obligations. Know who you are, how you do things, and what you do well so that you can serve others even better.
When you can articulate who you serve and help, self-promotion disappears and is replaced by total service.
Take a personal inventory
Sit down and give yourself time and space to think about who you are and how you’re made up. What are the things you naturally do that can serve other people? This can be difficult to see from a personal perspective sometimes, so it’s important to do a copule things.
- Step away from influences that will morph your natural self.
- Ask the people closest to you what they believe your strengths are, and how you’ve served them.
Allow for change
One of the most difficult parts of understanding ourself is to then look at what needs to be changed. Once you understand how you’ve been designed and created, it’s time to ask yourself…
What do I want to be known for?
This is your opportunity to truly design your life. We’re not just workers or moms or neighbors — we’re whole people. So what is it that you, as a whole human, want to be known for in your life? What sort of a legacy do you want to leave?
Leaving a legacy
Every single person on earth wants to live a life of significance. This isn’t only found through celebrities or 100k Instagram followers. It’s found in how you take care of your family, how you love others, how you interact with people in your every day life.
When it comes down to the daily, mundane decisions, so many of us don’t make decisions that are in alignment with that legacy we want to leave.
Tiffany urges you to know yourself deeply, know what legacy you want to leave, and then consistently ask yourself if every decision you make is supporting that legacy.
This is how generational artisans and legacies are crafted. We’re doing so much more than serving ourselves when we look through the lens of our legacy. We’re creating environments that will teach our children what legacy we want to shape, and they will grow and expand upon that with every move they make.
A legacy is so much more than a job title. It’s what people remember about you.
Make space for your legacy
Neil Postman wrote a book decades ago called Amusing Ourselves to Death. The overall idea of the book was that, one day, we’d create a culture that was so obsessed with entertainment that we would no longer be critical thinkers.
Unfortunately, Postman’s predictions were true! We are so chemically addicted to the experience of social media that it takes away our ability to critically think about how we’re spending our time. So in the hustle and bustle of day to day life, the constant notifications, the millions of distractions… how do we give ourselves the space to truly think about our legacy?
- Step back and assess the cost of this distractions.
- Take time every day to learn about yourself and your character.
- Make the hard decisions that will actually support your growth and evolution.
And most importantly? Learn to observe. Yourself, others, the world. It will all support your long-term decision making.
Go leave your legacy!
If you’d like to get to know Dr. Eurich better, you can find her at https://tiffanyeurich.com/
In this episode, Tiffany and I talk about:
- How to discover your strengths
- Why you need to know yourself well in order to see the bigger picture
- How to create space in your daily life to building your legacy
Resources Mentioned in this Episode
- Everything You Need To Know About Setting Goals – Without Getting Overwhelmed And Giving Up
- Pruning To Grow – How To Purposefully Pursue Multiple Passions (Without Spreading Yourself Too Thin) Featuring Lauren Carnes
- Growing With Purpose: The Power Of Investing In Yourself With Logan Doerries
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