Everyone has big dreams! And I don’t just mean dreams of being a millionaire or traveling the world — big dreams can look different for us all. But I think one thing we can all agree on is that we all want to find more balance.
Balance between work and home life. Between being a parent and still making time for yourself. Balance between all the things you’re juggling right now.
We all want balance so we don’t constantly feel overwhelmed, stressed, and exhausted. But does it ever feel like the only way to “achieve balance” is to change everything about your life? And that you have to make all those changes immediately?
In my time as a time management coach, I’ve seen what happens when someone sets a goal to “create more balance in their lives.” Most of the time, they end up frustrated, annoyed, and stuck.
Why? Because the space between where they are and where they want to go just feels too big.
But the truth is that transformation is a step-by-step process, not an instantaneous one! And the road to balance? It can take a bit longer than we’d hope — but finding balance is worth the wait!
Defining balance for yourself
Balance seems to be one of those Insta-buzzwords that everyone talks about, but to be honest, I don’t think we really know what it is. Or more accurately, I don’t think we really know what it means for us, as individuals.
Truthfully, I don’t care what the textbook definition of work/life balance is or how someone else defines it. WE get to define balance for ourselves. And inevitably, it will look different from person to person.
Maybe for you, that’s more time to reach a personal goal, like running a marathon or starting a family. Or maybe it’s the chance to close your laptop shut on Friday and enjoy the weekend. It’s totally up to you!
Why it’s so important to define balance for yourself
If you don’t define balance for yourself, you tend to fall into the “unspoken rules” around what balance looks like.
If we don’t think about it, we tend to assume that balance means we’re never stressed, right? We work no more than 40 hours a week, we eat well, exercise, and have time for the kids’ activities. We go on date nights and get to hang out with friends. Everything is easy!
That may be the “societal” version of balance… but that’s not real life, y’all. We all know it.
But it’s so easy to get this pie-in-the-sky vision in our heads — and then we get upset when our lives don’t look like that! It’s all in basing our definition of balance in REALITY.
Obstacle to Finding Balance: Beware of “future thinking”
While I love a good vision for the future — and planning for that future — I do think that sometimes we can be limited by thinking too far ahead. It can be an obstacle to finding balance.
Thinking about where you want to be in 5, 10, 15, or 80 years from now is so important for determining what’s valuable to you, and can help you see some gaps in where you may not be balanced. But our definitions of balance will change over time. What feels balanced to us this month may not be in two months. So when we think too far ahead, it can be an obstacle to finding balance.
If your family grows, you may find that “balance” means more time at home and less time at work. But if your career changes, balance may mean more time at the office. If you have a loss in your life, you may find that spending more time with loved ones means balance.
Obstacle to Finding Balance: Future thinking can freeze us up
There is another reason to be wary of future thinking: It’s easy to get stuck. With big dreams usually comes a mental image of what “the ideal” future looks like. Instead of feeling inspired, we start to feel overwhelmed.
We see where we are and where we want to be and it feels like a giant mountain in front we aren’t sure we have the tools to climb. And when you feel like you’ll never get from where you are NOW to where you want to be, it’s easy to get discouraged.
You stop trying to find balance because it feels so unattainable and there are so many dang steps. But what you do today is just as important as what you see in your future.
What you’re doing right now, if done intentionally, will get you where you want to go. Keep making choices that get you closer to that point!
Creating balance doesn’t happen overnight
The journey matters just as much as the destination. Believe that!
You’re more than capable of bringing those big dreams to life, you just need to take it one step at a time. Because to get from where you are right now to where you want to be, to find that balance, there are a lot of steps to take to make it happen.
You need a clear picture to get there. To know what that next or first step looks like for you. You need milestones, timing, and specifics. And I’d love to help you with that — and that’s why I created the It’s About Time Academy.
In this episode, we talk about:
- What “balance” really means (and why defining it for yourself is so important)
- Why future thinking can be harmful at times
- How to find direction so you can create sustainable, long-term balance in your life
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